There are three institutions on planet earth: government, church (or mosque), and family. The family unit is the building block of the other two. Family begins as a relationship. A relationship is a commitment. A commitment from the heart, a want, a serious desire. Each of the parties has to desire it profusely and be ready to sacrifice a lot for the lover. For in life, one must give up something to gain something else.
Isn’t it lovely just to watch a seventy-year-old couple walking down the street holding hands with smiles on their faces? Or at home chatting over a cup of coffee? Even children love the very sight of it. It is not as hard as most millennials imagine. Millennials are much less likely to commit than the older generation. They don’t want to be rushed into things like marriage relationships.
What is a commitment? A commitment is a person’s decision to stay together with a spouse for better or for worse. Part of the benefits is security and a feeling of safety and the warmth that goes with it. A relationship requires greater sacrifice than friendship.
For spouses who want to remain committed through old age, it helps to formulate a relationship statement. Moreover, seven words must be practiced every single day: is thank you; please; I am sorry; excuse me; welcome. Also, dreams must be shared right from courtship. Spending as much time together is crucial. That gives room to endless communication. For communication should be the daily meal of every marriage. Communication builds trust over time. Love and trust are fragile elements that must be built and repaired and polished all the time.
One must appreciate the partner profusely, taking every opportunity to show it. This eliminates a very dangerous hurtful habit called blame-game. It is also important to avoid distractions and temptations. A spouse who values the marriage will avoid environments and surroundings that are not conducive to the institution of marriage.
Sex life must be kept burning for as long as possible. This is part of intimacy and oneness. An emotional and physical aspect that has a spiritual significance. And that fosters trust. It is one way of showing love and affection.
There is a legal contract called marriage covenant, but this is simply a hollow shell prepared by governments to take care of crumbling marriages. In reality, the marriage of committed spouses is not a legal contract. More than that, it is a love contract. A heart issue cannot be covenanted, whether in youth or old age. The thing is to keep that love and commitment burning forever.
So we see the secret of staying committed to the spouse even at old age is more like a beautiful garden that must be tendered daily and carefully. Besides, the habits and duties of marriage well-practiced become a valuable lesson to the youth that it is doable, and gives them the hope and assurance they need to engage the marriage relationship gear.